Nickeisha Gray
Dr. Ximena Gallardo C.
November 25, 2008
Dear Dairy,
I really do miss my husband, however, I cannot let my son or my people realized I am mourning over the lost of my husband. I am the queen of Denmark I am suppose to be strong not weak. My people should not see me weeping for my husband, how they will respond towards their queens weeping. I have to be strong for my son sake also. He needs a strong mother to stand by him. What happen to my husband is tragic but everyone don’t live forever, they evenly die. I cannot wait the rest of my live without someone to love me and hold me.
I have to move on for my sake, my son sake, and my people’s sake. “Do not for ever with thy vailed lids Seek for thy noble father in the dust, thou know'st 'tis common; all that lives must die, passing through nature to eternity” (Act 1 Scene 2). I have always felt an attraction to Claudius he makes me feel so alive and unique. He is very striking and charming. He loves me like no other man did. Not even my husband Hamlet. I am in love with Claudius. I know I am wrong for marrying my husband brother and I also disappointed my son, but I am happy with Claudius he makes me feel like a woman when we are together.
I would never intently do anything to hurt Hamlet. I love him and my son. Everyone feels that I was a conspirator towards his death but I could not harm a hair on his body even if I wanted to. It hurt so badly because I can see the pain and sorrow in my son eyes every time I look at him. He feels I have disappointed him and that I had something to do with his father deaths. Maybe I am being selfish right now about marrying Claudius because I am just thinking about myself but being with Claudius relaxes me from missing my husband. I am innocent I would never kill my husband for my own benefits.
Oh my I don’t know what else to do my son just kill Polonius right in front of me. Did I drive my son into insanity? I cannot understand what have become of my son. Everyone around me is dying. I cannot believe my ears my son speaks to me without any remorse. He has such anger and frustration towards me. “What have I done, that thou darest wag thy tongue in noise so rude against me?” (Act 3 Scenes 4). I wonder why my son is asking me so many questions. He has gone mad; I wonder what is going on through that head of his. He has such a harsh tone with me. Did he forget that I am his mother? I don’t really know what will happen next with my son or in Denmark. I do know that nothing will ever be the same again. So much pain and dishonesty have been going on in Denmark. I feel I lead my son to this point in his life.
I feel I did have a hand in everything that happens in Denmark. After my husband Hamlet death everything went downhill. Nothing was the same. Claudius was the man I felt in love with but I ask myself did I lead him into killing my husband or did he marry me because of power or maybe he just wanted both. My son was right all along Claudius killed his own brother how blind could I have been. I am so sorry for everything. I never meant to hurt my husband and especially my son. Hamlet is full of so many emotions hurt, pain, lost, anger, frustration, and revenge. I know he will kill Claudius for what he did to his father. I know him especially mad because Claudius married me. My future does not look too bright any more I have cause too many pain and I cannot stand to see the pain in my son eyes, it just tears me apart. I don’t see the point of living anymore everything I loved and cherish is gone from me. For some reason I don’t feel well I feel very weak. My eyes are very blurry. Oh no I have been poisoned (weeping) before I say my last farewell I would like to finish off by saying please remember me as being a blind fool in love. I love my husband and son with all my heart and soul. I have served Denmark well with every fiber in my body. I am only human and we all make mistakes. I just want everyone to remember that we only grow by learning from our mistakes. To my dear son Hamlet I love you and please remember I would never do anything to intently hurt you (kisses). Farewell everyone…………..
Love,
Gertrude
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